Tuesday, May 24, 2011

"Easter Weekend: The Last Hoorah: (Saturday)"

          Saturday was a buffet of adventure. Stev and I awoke at Serah's place and though our clothes were soaked from the previous night's downpour, we declined Serah's offer to drive us back to Hotel Arch as it was merely two blocks away. Besides, the sun was shining so it just seemed like walking weather. I am sure that I am not the first male to harp on this but there is something very poetic about getting laid. Correction. There is something poetic about awaking from a great lay, the sun seems to shine more intently, the birds seem to sing sweeter songs and everything seems possible. It's an interesting phenomenon, that begs a psychological explanation because surely the world has not changed a bit, simply your post, climactic view of it. During that walk back to Arch, Stev and I discussed various points of interest including my apparent ability to generate mini earthquakes (lol. It had been a LONG time coming). We quickly arrived at Hotel Arch and within 20 minutes, our merry band of brothers had gathered. In my quest to end my drought the night before, Chin and Andre had joined us at Rick's but it was after 1 am. CLEARLY, my mind was set on one goal so I did not have a seething desire to reacquaint with them then. Shit, my mother could have been at Rick's after 1 am and I would have no desire to reacquaint with her; but then again, I would have NO desire to reacquaint with my mother ANY NIGHT at Rick's. It's not that kind of place. Thus I caught up with Andre and Chin, again, and shortly after, Cass, Stev, Sweeny and I joined them to begin our day of adventure. As we did a lot and my memory is fading from nearly four weeks back (reasons to be a prompt blogger), I will simply attempt to list where we went and some notable moments. 

          Our first stop was Kroger as Chin and Sweeny had to pick up their ingredients for the sangria competition. We piled into Cassie's car and made our way down State St to the grocery store to gather. The funniest thing happened as we were heading for the checkout. I was observing the deli chicken, that sustained me through most of senior year (insert black joke here), when Stev said, "Look! Shape Ups!" What!!! I turned to my left to observe the silhouette of a girl in jogging clothes that I had not taken notice off earlier as she was attractive challenged. I looked down at her feet and indeed she was wearing "Skecher's Shape Ups!" For MONTHS, my TV has been bombarded with those damn commercials about soccer moms, and former athletes WELL past their glory, all regaining their form because they were wearing Shape Ups. There was even that sultry,  Superbowl commercial featuring Kim Kardashian, to induce people to buy the damn shoes. I doubted that the shoes worked as well as advertised but the commercials were EVERYWHERE. Yet, I had failed to actually meet someone who owned a pair in real life. Thus in my excitement at actually seeing them in use I shouted out, "Shape Ups!" Imagine if someone tells you that to your left is Sasquatch, or a UFO, or nowadays Matthew Wheeler, your gonna turn and look excitedly! Apparently, no one understood this fact as they quickly shouted out, "No Mike!" However, it was too late as the girl had already heard me. She stopped walking and turned around to stand unattractively sassy, in front of us saying, "Really? Really? Really? We're REALLY gonna go there?" I was lost as I couldn't help but think, "Go where bitch? I actually liked your shoes." Thus, I couldn't help but force back a laughter as I was truly about to give her a compliment before she took it the wrong way. She struck me as that girl in school who was teased with nicknames like "Melancholy Mary," or "Smelly Suzy," so now as a young adult, she took every apparent slight as a reason to now stand up for herself. Well, here's to you "Dirty Deidre," you go girl! It was really funny and life is like that sometimes, you can be an apparent ass when it wasn't your intention but 1502 should have known better. All I said was, "Shape Ups!" Thus for the rest of the weekend, it became a running joke that if you see someone with Shape Ups, DON'T call them out.


          After returning to Hotel Arch, Sweeny and Chin concocted their sangria's and placed them in the fridge to chill, then the group made our way over to Dominick's to begin drinking. It was sometime after 9 am when we arrived and so they were literally opening up as the six of us walked into the doors. Situated across from the business and law schools, Dominick's is truly the "older" bar on central campus as no underage drinkers are EVER allowed there. This was a comforting fact since Rick's had now lost this virtue. We walked up to the counter and place an order for 3 "Constant Buzz" drinks. They were red in color, and contained a smoothie like consistency but the draw was that they came in huge, mason jars. We decided that we would split one drink between two people. We made our way to the back and sat at one of the picnic tables to get our buzz on. As we were laughing and sharing stories and discussing our plans for the day, Sweeny looks at his drink then up at the group and shouts out, "Guys! It's about to be 10 am and we're NOT even drunk yet!" Everyone looked at him and laughed at the outburst. You have to LOVE my friends. Not being drunk at 10 am was reason enough to lament. We continued as such and nearing the bottom of our drinks everyone, except for Andre, echoed the sentiments that we were not feeling the drink. Shit at $22 dollars a pop, there was nothing "constant" or "buzzing" about them. A better label would have been, "It's-possible-but-don't-hold-your-breath buzz." However, we were in too good a mood and finished our drinks before beginning the walk back to Hotel Arch. We had decided to go observe the track meet over in Ypsilanti at Eastern Michigan University, so the plan was to stock up on mixed drinks. In case you we're unaware, after watching your friend perform, there is NOTHING do at a track meet, so it's NOT on the list of things to do on a first date. Thus we needed the liquid courage to sit through it. We filled the containers and the six of us piled into Chin's compact sedan (Not Recommended), to make our way over to Eastern.


           As expected, we watched maybe 2 races at the track meet and the rest of the time was spent talking with old friends, drinking and playing games. A favorite was to pick who would come in last, during a given race. The only stipulation was that you could not pick a Wolverine as that is un-American. Go Blue!!! However, imagine the agony of picking a runner that you were SURE looked the part of a snail. I'm talking about the person with the headband, tight shorts, and knee high socks that looked like they were something out of "That 70's Show." The race would begin and surely they would be somewhere in the back of the pack but then somehow, by divine intervention, they would gain some miraculous kick on the last leg of the race and end up somewhere in the front! The first time I played this game, my guy actually won the damn race and I was MAD!!! I can laugh now, but it seriously adds another dimension of drama that is entirely lacking in track. Sometime after, my mother called and indicated that the whole family was coming up to Ann Arbor to have a birthday dinner with me. She also had to buy my sister somethings for her graduation in a week, thus she wanted to make a day of it. I told her that I was at the track meet but that she should call whenever she reached AA. The group then decided to head over to Sidetracks restaurant as according to St. Amant, they had the "Best Burger In Michigan." Sweeny REALLY wanted to try it so with such a lofty reputation, it seemed an appropriate place for lunch. Personally, I would have held out for the place with the "Best Burger In The World" but times are tough, I get it. Before leaving, we ran into Porter, an ex Wolverine track star who was now training in AA. He was Stan's, Stev's older brother, year so, he was a few years older than me and I didn't really get to know him. However, every time that I had met him, he was exactly as advertised. He was set to marry Tiffany, another track star, in about two weeks so he talked to Stev about his family coming and such. When he got to Andre he looked at him and asked, "Where you been at? I would have sent you an invitation but you don't get back at me on Facebook. (Andre has been known to be flaky, more on this later)" The conversation proceeded before Porter told the entire group a story that made us laugh. He began with, "I've always said. There are 3 types of niggas in this world! 1.) Braylon Edwards, future NFL star so he got girls because groupies love football players and that whole swag. 2.) Michael Whitehead, not quite the star power of a Braylon but he oozed with charisma and would hit anything that walks so he did quite WELL for himself. 3.) And Andre Barnes. He didn't have the swag of a Braylon, or the charm of a Whitehead so when you heard that he messed with a girl you were like, "What???" It was too funny as Andre was trying to downplay it while the entire group was laughing. Porter finished by asking him, "Get at me on Facebook, early enough to make your RSVP and are you bringing a date?" Andre responded with a no. So as I was sitting next to Dre I looked at him and said, "Ayo bring me if you don't get a date." Since I had met Stev and his brother, I had heard about this ensuing wedding between Porter/Tiffany that would inevitably result in them birthing ridiculously muscular and talented children, who would go on to take over the world. I had heard about this wedding for almost 3 years so I wanted to go and Dre said that he would arrange it. He wanted to watch the rest of the track meet, thus Cass, Chin, Stev, Sweeny and I piled our way back into Chin's car to drive over to Sidetrack's. 


          We arrived at Sidetrack's and wouldn't you know it, it was located beside train tracks so they person that named it must have thought he or she was very clever. We sat outside on the patio and ordered our drinks and kept carrying on. I didn't want to eat heavy as I was eating with my family later so after the waitress told us that their chili was a champion winning chili at some cook off, I ordered it. The group ordered our drinks and they arrived as we talked and waited for our food. Side note, we learned that Chin knew about Stev galfing with Whitney! Whitney was this sweet girl that would bake us cakes and other delights and she was REALLY feeling Chin. However, he spurned her for that girl whose name rhymes with "busy." Let me set the record straight. It's not that I don't like "busy" it was just that she was very young to me and seemed "boy crazy" except for my boy, Chin. The first time that I met this girl, she literally burst through the front door at 1502, screaming, "Where's the Utah Jazz game?!?!" (She's from Utah). She then proceeded to grab our remote and change to the Utah fucking Jazz game. 1.) I already don't like the Utah Jazz for those two assholes, Stockton and Malone, trying to prevent his "Airness, Michael Jordan" from winning those two championships. 2.) Who the fuck is actually from Utah? Thus I was like, "Who is this bitch, and PLEASE escort her from my house before I have to." However, I found out that she was the apparent apple of Chin's eye so I bit my tougue. Also, if you know me, you know that I have a thing for older women. I can meet two girls of equal attractiveness and I will choose one, simply because she is older than I. Whitney was in grad school and "busy" was this doe eyed freshman. To me it was "No Brainer." Besides, I never recived a cupcake from "busy" and what's the way to a man's heart? Thus it was annoying to watch Chin, chase this little girl, when grown and sexy Whitney was ready and willing. Apparently, "busy" is a nice girl when you get to know her but I never got the opportunity to do so. Side note, I'm the type of person that if I don't like you then I write you off. This is because I HATE being fake or two faced. Believe it or not, I was not always "Michael O." After moving to the States in the late 90's, we moved around a lot so I was always the "new kid." I always felt like I had missed out as I didn't have those "Remember that one time in 2nd grade" stories. Thus with the white kids I was the "weird African boy" and with black kids I wasn't "black enough." For years, I struggled to fit in and one of the most hurtful things was when people would feign interest or care for me, but then I would discover that behind my back they were dogging me out and instigating conflict. Thus one of the biggest chips on my shoulder is a direct result of YEARS of being treated this way. I developed this "fuck the world" mentality and when I eventually came into my own, I promised myself that I would not be like those people. If I don't like you, then I just won't put up with you, and it's not say that I am mean to you. Case in point, David Sweeny. I could not STAND this kid when I met him. To his credit he has matured and toned it down from his sophomore year to his senior year and honestly, without Chin bringing him around and me getting to see the intellectual side of him, I would now not consider him a friend. Remember I didn't run track so I only saw him at him utmost inebriated and obnoxious. He would ALWAYS pull out his soap box and go on his pretentious rants about EVERYTHING, before he would proceed to drunkenly do something stupid. For people like me who went to Michigan, it's ALWAYS annoying when students who are more privileged complain about certain things. I can't relate as I would have given anything to grow up like them. I realize that people only know what they are intimately aware of and it takes getting out in the world to witness that everyone didn't grow up just like you. I've come to see that this is one of the biggest benefits of the "Michigan Difference" because it is a true melting pot. Where else in our young lives would we meet such an assortment of individuals and backgrounds? True story. I was once talking to my black friend from Atlanta and during the conversation she said "Coming to Michigan was a "step down" from her high school." What?!?! She was serious, it wasn't like she was being boastful as I sat there DUMBFOUNDED. Where did she go to high school...Heaven??? So whether it's a Cass, or Chin, or Sweeny, or Wheeler, or my rich black friends, or my rich white friends, when I hear certain complaining, I can't help but have the thought in the back of my mind like, "Shut the fuck up!" So when I told Sweeny that I couldn't stand him he was surprised like, "Really?" because I was never mean to him. If he was over the house drinking, I was sociable and talked to him as needed. However, when he was out of sight he was none existent to me because I don't have the patience for people I don't like. So in returning to my point about being fake, I would rather not bang with you, than "pretend" that I give a fuck about you. Everyone talks privately to their friends about other people, that's different. What I'm talking about is when you dog someone out, throw them under the bus and then back the bus up to run them over again, YET when you see them it's, "Hey! How's it going? How's your mom, you're such a sweetheart!!!" <<<FAKE!!! Cassie's team, among others, was KNOWN for this and I can't do it. It's not for me. So going back to "busy," I just didn't have time for the girl but it wasn't personal. If she's ever in Detroit and wants to do some "black" things, I can bang with that. (I swear I never mean to go on these side notes, it's simply where the writing takes me).


          In going back to Whitney, I want to say that she's a sweetheart but I believe that part of hooking up with Stev was partly a means to get back at Chin, because after her and Stev, she NEVER talked to us again and I miss those damn cupcakes! In hindsight, it easily could have been me but I felt kind of bad for having to keep it from Chin, however the other side of me didn't care because Chin brought it upon himself. He could have easily told her that his feelings for her weren't as strong and left her alone. So it was good that it came out because Stev and I had literally talked about Whitney the night before assuming that Chin didn't know, so it was a funny revelation to discover that he had known for a while. "After tonight, don't bring your bring ya girl around me. True player for real, ask my niggas for real.." (Shout outs to you if you know that lyric but I'm wagging my finger at you. Don't pursue partners that your friends have a history with because it puts you in an awkward position). Remember it's "Death before dishonor," "Chick's before dicks," and "Bro's before hoes." Always. It's how gentlemen and gentlewomen live and more importantly galfers. "Aloha to women with no ties, to men that I know well, that way there are no lies." (Where's this lyric from?). So we ordered our food when we first sat down and 50 minutes later it had not arrived yet. We had to seek out the manager and inquire about our food as we hadn't even seen the server since she brought our order of drinks. Ten minutes later, the server/manager returned apologizing for the delay. CLEARLY the server had just been yelled at because she was scowling about something. As they walked away I said, "Yup! we're getting our shit spit in!" Our food eventually arrived and even if it was seasoned with saliva, it tasted good, so Sidetrack's is definitely recommended if you're ever in the Ypsilanti area. 


          We returned to Hotel Arch and I showered and got ready for the evening as my parent's were arriving in AA shortly. I then joined the rest of the guys on the roof in the midst of their sangria competition. I don't recall but the winner was between Chin or Sweeny, as Cassie's drink was ROUGH! We drank for a few hours and then my family pulled up to the front of Hotel Arch. The car was full so I hopped on my bike and followed them down to S. University for that Chinese restaurant that is across from TCF bank. (I don't recall the name so I don't want to make something up like "Sparkling Dragon" that's clearly ignorant). The food was delicious but I couldn't fully enjoy it as I was DRUNK! So I was fighting with all my might to force the food down and hold my shit together as I realized that I had never been drunk in front of my parent's. By the time I returned to Hotel Arch, the group had made their way over to Prickley Pear for dinner, so I parked my bike and walked to downtown AA. Conner Oneil's Pub was in the neighborhood so I stopped by for a few drinks as I was chatting it up with these older women at the bar (wink wink). My crew told me through a text message that they were finished with dinner, so I had to use the bathroom before I left. So I turned to seek the nearest bathroom. I saw people walking into this lobby area that was empty so I followed them. I tried to open the male bathroom and it was locked. Fuck! I really had to go or I would have pissed on myself. I turned around and the woman's bathroom was slightly opened so I knocked and pushed it open saying, "Excuse me. I really have to use the bathroom and the male one locked." It was just some woman frisking herself in the mirror. So I waited for 30 seconds before I couldn't stand it any longer, so I said, "Fuck it! You can watch," as I approached the toilet. Realizing that I was serious, she then stops playing with herself and walks out of the bathroom. Sometimes you can't talk about things, you simply have to do it! So she was out of the door by the time I pulled anything out and I spent maybe 8 seconds in the bathroom as I REALLY had to go. I washed my hands and exited and my crew was now standing before me along with that woman and the manager of Conner's. He had the THICKEST Irish accent that I've ever heard and I couldn't understand him. So I assumed that she must have told him that a "Crazy black guy attacked her and kicked her out of the bathroom" or something. He kept talking and was visibly upset but I was like, "Bruh! I cannot understand you, and the alcohol isn't helping," so we all laughed and left. We ended up at Bar Louie which was a BUZZ KILL, however Andre had rejoined us with "Kitty Kat." She was this exotic, sultry petite girl that he had met in Chicago. Apparently, she was in Tri-Delta and this was a shock because I had always assumed that they only permitted prissy white girls to join their ranks. This is the same sorority that when girls are pledging they go through the prospects closet to investigate her designer labels to determine if she was "worth enough" to become one of them. (See it's things like this, which include being fake, that I wrongly assumed I wouldn't see in college. However, I quickly learned as a freshman that being an undergraduate doesn't make you any more mature than reading the New York Times or something). Kitty Kat was clearly mixed with some kind of Asian but she was stunning! So Andre I APPROVE of that message. Andre eventually left with her to go play with Kitty Kat's Kat (I couldn't resist!). Shortly after, the five of us, made our way over to S. University and I remember NONE of this. When we "go to S. University" it inevitably means we end up at Rick's so I assume that I was kissing someone, but I didn't go home with any girl, however, it was still a great night.



Wednesday, May 18, 2011

"Easter Weekend: The Last Hoorah: (Friday): It's My Birthday!"

          I awoke on Friday and I was still reeling from the previous nights revelations. At around the same time, Stev ventured back into the basement and it was while talking with him, that I realized that it was my birthday. I was officially 23 and I had to ponder this thought for a second. I have goals that I have written down. Goals that I would like to achieve before I am 30 and so everyday that I have not achieved them, I almost feel inept. Thus in my mini depressed state at home, I really felt like I was 29 years old. Just being in AA, reminded me of my youth. I opened my laptop and found a song that was first inspired when Amanda and I's stalemate first began. The song was called "Creepin" and I never finished it as I still had the first verse to write. So when I awoke, it was this song that I was working on when Stev returned to the basement. I have uploaded it here for you to sample, so remember that where the first verse should be is a freestyle that I just added to fill the space.

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          Eventually Sweeny, Braun, and St. made their way down to the basement as well. Everyone wished me a happy birthday as Stev sang, "I ain't had sex in a long time." (It's a song). Apparently, he had been in a long drought as well since his breakup with 45. However, if you can recall, he had ended his drought mere hours ago with the Asian girl from Rick's. So I looked at him and said "Really?" My drought was still ongoing from late January. Thus it was concluded that the goal for my birthday was to get me laid. We had a few hours to kill as Cassie had scheduled a 1 pm lunch at Benny's. Thus we began to watch "Dante's Peak," with Pierce Brosnan. I don't how this began, but instead of watching the film for simple entertainment, we began to critique the many, flawed plot lines. For example, there was a scene where the grandmother could have easily jumped onto the lakeside deck to avoid getting burned by the sulfuric acid that was caused by the exploding volcano. Instead, like an idiot, she chose to SLOWLY wade through the water to reach the shore and seconds after she arrived on shore, she collapsed and died from her burns. They were clearly trying to write her out of the film. We continued like this for another hour but then everyone was STARVING. With the boys taking finals, and Stev and I being in the "real world," we had all woken up fairly early and so by noon, we needed food. I couldn't take it anymore, thus I grabbed some left over Chinese from when I had arrived on Wednesday. About 30 minutes later, none of the boys could stand their hunger as well, so save for Braun, we all made an executive decision to head to Benny's. As we boarded St. Amant's car, I noted how miserably rainy the weather was. For whatever reason, my birthday's have always been good for torrential downpours. The worst being when I got my first bike and it rained for a week straight. As we pulled into the Benny's parking lot, we received a text message from Cassie that she now needed a ride to Benny's, from her mom's law firm. She had wrongly assumed that her mom had left her with the car. Being that St Amant was the only one who was driving, we laughed as this obviously fell on him. His demeanor was "Fuck that!" Cassie's law firm is in downtown AA, which is the opposite direction of where Benny's is located. We would just have to meet up with her later and so we sat down to order our breakfast. Somehow we entered in a sarcastic conversation with our waitress that I had never seen. After learning that she was 30, I told her that I was turning 29 and asked what the birthday special was. She laughed and said something about bringing me soup. I never did get the soup but thanks to the lovely "Mrs. Benny," (we've never gotten her name, as she's simply "Benny's wife") my meal was free so things were looking up as we left the diner.

         We ended up back at Hotel Arch to shower and prep for our day. Somehow somebody turned the TV to "Biker Boyz" and this movie is hilarious because seemingly, any ethnic actor that's ever been in anything was this film. Rufio made an appearance, my man Booby Miles (Derek Luke), Meagan Good was absolutely delicious, Orlando Jones, Morpheus (Laurence Fishburne), Cedric the entertainer, the one black dude that used to be on "ER," It was hilarious. They were pulling brothers from EVERYWHERE. Eventually we got dressed and it was time to head over to Cassie's. Sweeny made some statement about going to the track meet and I told him, "Unless you're tryna swim to Ypsi, you better roll with us." He pondered it for a second and correctly decided that it was better to roll with Stev and I. Moments later, we were out of the door and into Cassie's car. I don't recall how we came into possession of Cassie's whip, slang for car, but about 5 minutes later we picked her up from downtown AA and headed to her place. Her and Sweeny exited the car as Stev and I had to run to Kroger to pick up some supplies. Apparently a sangria competition had been planned for the next day and so Cass needed her supplies. When we eventually returned they chided us for "taking forever" but remember we went to the north campus Kroger, so it took some time to navigate there. Funny side note, at Kroger's, we went to pick up some wine and not only did the bottle have a screw top, the name was "Flip Flop." I asked Stev, "Flip Flop? Better ask Cass if she wants quality or price." After Stev called her, what do you think she picked? We picked up some chips and salsa and headed back to Cassie's. When we arrived, Cass, Sweeny and a voluptuous black girl with long wavy hair that I had never seen were all in the apartment. Her name was Jayne, and she also worked at Cass' law firm and was in fact a high school classmate of Cassie's but as Pioneer High had thousands of kids in each class, the two did not know each other in high school. Sweeny, Stev and I sat on one side of the kitchen island, while Cass, Jayne and eventually Maria, were on the other side prepping the chips salsa and drinks. What was IMMEDIATELY apparent about Jayne were her breasts. You have to understand, I'm not even that guy to first notice this fact, as I tend to prefer the "posterior curves" (PC way of saying Big o'l BOOTY) of a girl. Also from living with Cass for more than a year, I quickly noticed that usually, she has the biggest mammary glands in a square mileage. And they once prompted Stev to shout out "Let's Go BOOBS!!!" before one of her volleyball games (Let's go blue is a Wolverine chant). Cassie turned around and simply shook her head at us as we exploded in laughter. However, the fact remained that many a free drinks for the boys of 1502, have come on behalf of Cassie's chest. Seriously guys, if you don't want to ever pay for drinks at the bar, find a female friend with GIANT breasts and make it a point to go out with her. You will quickly find that other guys are idiots as they assume that simply buying a girl drinks will automatically get her clothes off (Sometimes it works but what happens is when every other guy is also buying her drinks, she has options and can be selective). However, as we stood on the other side of the island, Jayne was going "tit for tit" with Cass. This was crazy in of itself but then to accentuate things, she was wearing a bright, yellow, wife beater as she danced, seductively, in front of us. Let's put it this way, she should have been offended if we didn't notice. We began drinking and carrying on and Jayne indicated that she was moving to LA next week. In making conversation I asked her "For what" and she said, "Riding horses." I replied with, "Like a vacation? That seems like a random affirmation?" She laughed at my point and elaborated that she took a job as a horse trainer. This girl was definitely quirky. So I replied with, "Oh, okay. And what else do you ride?" She gave me that sultry look like she knew exactly what I was referring to...riding the train. About 30 minutes after Maria had arrived, we decided to hit the town and so the 6 of us all walked out of the apartment on our way to Tomukun restaurant. 

          A funny moment occurred on our walk to Tomukun. For whatever reason, Sweeny, Cass, and Maria, all the white people, and Stev, Jayne and I bunched up in groups of threes with an impossible divide between us. Sweeny and Cass kept looking back wondering, "Why are you guys back there?" And we replied with, "Why are you guys up there?" This division of the races was funny and I am curious to if it is a sub conscious thing, or a chance occurrence. We arrived at the restaurant with the three of them waiting for us at the first table by the door. Thus, Jayne, Stev and I took our seats across from them. I made it a point to sit in between Stev and Jayne because you should never be on the edge on your birthday. When our server arrived I began to chat her up as you should ALWAYS make it a point to engage the people that handle your food. Someone that likes you or finds your presence enjoyable is less likely to spit in your shit. So I began talking to this cute girl and discovered that she was actually a bit older and had just finished her thesis. Intelligence and attractiveness, this was right up my alley, so I asked her the title of her thesis,  as I am actually supposed to be heading to a thesis defense in the near future. I swear, what she replied with was the LONGEST title of anything that has ever been written. She opened her mouth and this is what I heard, "Something something something something something something, geology, something something something something, natural, something something something something something science!" No bullshit! She had to take a breath in between saying the title before she could actually finish. I gave her a high five as we all erupted in laughter. There was NO WAY that she could have made that up if she tried. After the laughter subdued, we ordered our food, some Japanese beer, a white drink that I didn't really care for and SAKE BOMBS!!! I had always wanted 1502 to go sake bombing but that is one activity that slipped through the cracks so I was admittedly excited. When our food arrived, Jayne taught me how to use chop sticks and I could not contain my excitement! I was always that person at the Asian restaurants that had to ask for the forks, so when she showed me how to handle them enough to get some rice into my mouth, I felt like Tom Hanks in "Castaway" when he pounded his chest proudly after he had made some fire. It was exactly this motion that I reenacted saying, "Look I have used chopsticks!" Cassie found this amusing and so the table laughed. Eventually our sake bombs arrived and we were instructed to take care with these glasses as they were prone to shattering. Fail! Why offer sake bombs if you can't bomb the sake? I threw caution to the wind and said, "Fuck it!" We filled our glasses with beer and after dropping the shot glasses filled with sake into our glasses, Stev and I took the bombs. Success!!! We ended up taking about four more rounds until the beer was finished. After I got Jayne's number, I noticed that she wasn't drinking as she indicated that she was not coming out for the rest of the evening. She had to drive to Lansing to see her friends play in a band. I looked at her and said, "Woah! It's my birthday. You still have 364 days of the year to go watch your friends be lame." She laughed at this but made some lame excuse and so the table paid for our bill and headed for the exit on our way to Skeeps (Scorekeepers bar and grille). Most of the group ran ahead as a few people, including Jayne had to first use the bathroom. I decided to stand on the sidewalk and wait. When she finally exited the restaurant, I was the only one in the group that wasn't yet at Skeeps, so she asked, "Why are you waiting here?" Without hesitation, I walked right up to her, pulled her into me, and passionately kissed her as if I would never see her again (as I probably will never see her again). If memory serves correctly, that was 2 hours between the initial meeting and the first kiss, so by 1502's standards I have to shave off an hour and a half from that time (lol). I'd been out the game for a while so you have to excuse me for not being in game shape. I watched her face light up as I immediately turned around to head to Skeeps. Before I crossed the street I turned over my shoulder and asked, "So I'll see you tomorrow right?" She nodded her head in response. I knew I would never see her again so I crossed the street and headed to Skeeps.
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          At Skeeps, the night began to speed up as the alcohol was starting to catch up with us. I ordered the FREE birthday burger which is almost a hidden gem of AA because many people are unaware of it. The other thing of note, was that they had dollar beers of Friday nights. Also, I ran into Tessa and her sorority sisters on a senior bar crawl, as they were about to graduate in a week. Aside from us, they basically were the only people at Skeeps. I knew it was her immediately when I walked in but we only crossed paths when her and the girls were leaving. She removed her plastic sunglasses and asked, "Oh my God. Michael O, is this really happening, why are you here?" I responded with, "Apparently it's my birthday so I'm going to get laid tonight." You have to realize, this girl and I do NOT have regular conversations. She was a neighbor from my sophomore dormitory days and on two occasions, we had hooked up in a drunken stupor. It was not memorable as the first time she actually said to me, "I'm NOT going to be fucked like dog!" This was a letdown as doggy style is one of my go to positions when I'm trying to put it down. Besides, I didn't like her like that to only do missionary, and so by senior year, I began to decline all of her advances to the point where she once told me, "No! I've learned a lot PLEASE come over so I can show you." Once during senior year, I almost fell for this, but as I sat in her room, I couldn't bring myself to make a move so I simply left. Thus before she left Skeeps, she looked up at me and said, "Well, we'll probably end up at Rick's so if you come and find me, you can fuck me on your birthday." I looked down at her and said, "Okay!" Nothing else happened of note at Skeeps and so shortly after, my group headed to Redhawk bar and grille on State St. Now, I was really feeling the alcohol, so I mostly did a lot of sitting and listening. Sean, one of Cassie's ex flames, made an appearance and you HAVE TO read the story that their first encounter inspired in my novel "Galfing: A Young Man's Guide." Also, I learned that Maria did not know how to find her pin on her Crackberry, which means that she did not know how to fully use BBM. This is the first thing that any Blackberry user should immediately familiarize themselves with as the pin can be displayed in the BBM profile or by pressing the Blackberry symbol key then going to  "Options" then  "Status." I shook my head at this revelation as it must be the Michigan State in her. Shortly after, we made our way across campus to Charley's and I remember NONE of this. We may have ordered "Longest Islands" but I cannot be sure. Soon enough it was time for Rick's so we rounded up the troops and headed over.

          I do not recall MUCH of our time at Rick's, but I remember thinking that outside of Jane and her rowing teammates, there were not a lot of girls at Ricks. Side note: Jane is Cassie's little sister and after playing lacrosse her freshman year, our senior year, she had now switched to rowing and was flourishing. In two years she is going to be running campus as she has that type of opposite personality, which is completely opposite  of Cassie. For example, Cassie might think about something and worry, Jane simply does it and deals with the consequences later. However, it was still unsettling that all of these young kids could easily get into Rick's now. There used to be a time when getting into Rick's meant something, seemingly nowadays any jackass with a terrible fake ID can get in. After 1 am, I noticed that Stev did not have girl either, so it really must have been slim pickings, but I just knew that tonight was my night. At around 1:40 I could feel the onset of last call and so I took one more look around the bar, and almost by divine intervention, our eyes simultaneously made contact. It was Serah, this med student from California that I had hooked up with once. I had always wanted to hook up with her again, but she would always hit me with lame excuses. However, as I looked into her eyes I realized that she was now thinking exactly what I was thinking, so I walked right up to her kissed her. No words were needed as it was instant attraction. We kissed for about 10 minutes, before I managed to pull my head back and say, "It's my birthday and I'm taking you home." It wasn't a request and like a soldier that knew how to fall in line, she looked up at me and said, "Okay!" At last call, she told me that she had to find her friend, and if it was the girl that I was thinking about,  I KNEW that she would be hunting Stev, so I told Serah not to worry about her. Serah and I made our way up the stairs of Rick's and actually ran into Stev as we hit the door. The rain that had subsided at Skeeps was now at a fever pitch and so Serah opened an umbrella as we stepped outside, while Stev walked off. As we were opening the umbrella, a girl behind us screamed out at the top of her lungs, "I'M BEING CHOKED RIGHT NOW AND I'M NOT EVEN HAVING SEX!!!" What?!?! Everyone turned around to see Paige, one of Jane's rowing teammates, horsing around with a football player. It would be Paige that would say that, as she was a wild one. In fact, most rowers are wild girls. Another thing to note about Michigan rowers is that they have a LONG history with the football players and black guys in general. The thing is that to row those giant boats, means that most of those girls are bigger than the average dude, except for the "coxswain," or navigator. Thus they tend to like the bigger, aggressive type of dudes and so the football team provides the perfect stable. I remember the first rower that I met at Michigan. It was freshman year, French class, and her name was Becca Larson. She was one year ahead of me and all kinds of sexy as I believe that she was a redhead at the time. Our seats were assigned next to each other and so when I would ask her things like, "Hey what's the time?"she would start to laugh. I'm funny but not THAT funny, so CLEARLY, she liked her coffee black! She would always invite me out to Touchdowns (no longer in existence due to numerous fights) but as I didn't yet possess a fake ID, I couldn't yet get in. And when I would see her at other venues, she somehow ALWAYS managed to attract the likes of Mike Hart, Kevin Grady, etc, star running backs WHEN we were good. In case you are unaware, Michigan football players are treated like demi-gods in AA, so I looked at it like either compete with these guys or go for a sure thing. I never made a move, thus Becca Larson if you ever read this, "What time is it?"

          The rain was angrily pouring down now and so Serah and I turned left and began to walk to her place. In making conversation I said, "You know I've never hooked up in the rain." She looks at me, grabs my harm forcefully and pulls me into the alley in between two houses. In the next moment, we were furiously going at it just under the window of one of the houses, as the rain beat down on top of us. Through one of her moans she managed to say, "I NEED you now" and I laughed in response. Little did she know the ass whopping that I had in store for her body. We eventually make it back to her place and I was soaked. I went to grab some water from kitchen, while she went to the bathroom. Moments later we were naked in her bed. She LOVES wearing robes and so I was on my back as I watched her walk into the room and de-robe, before climbing on top off me. Like the first time that we had hooked up, I watched as her enormous breasts cascaded on top of me. She has the largest breasts of anyone that I've ever hooked up with and I remember feeling like I had alligator arms, as I attempted to catch them. Now this is the first naked woman that I've seen since January, so I grab her and forcefully flip her over. With precision, I ripped off her panties in one fluid motion and I dived between her legs. I had remind myself of what a woman tasted like. Serah was delicious! So with my tongue I ravaged her, over and over and over again. She came like three times before we started having sex. Serah is one of those girls that her reputation precedes her as she is the definition of a wild girl. However, when I first entered her, the first time that we hooked up, I remember having the thought that she was entirely tight and cozy. I recall having this same thought as I entered her again and so we began to have sex and she felt SOO good. With excitement, I'm BEATING her up and she is cumming and cumming, which is followed by a trip to the bathroom after every time. Thus after her second trip to the bathroom, I in turn, grab my cup and head to the kitchen to refill it. As I entered the hallway, the front door opens up and Stev and Serah's friend arrive. I walk up to them, balls out, and begin a conversation. They, especially her, can't get over the fact that I am standing, semi-erect, and non nonchalantly in front of them, so they keep laughing. I hadn't had sex since January, so I didn't give a fuck. I felt like Adam in the Garden of Eden, entirely unaware by my nakedness. I made my way back to the room and Serah is awaiting me as she is now kneeling on the edge of the bed on all fours. I have to say this. This girl's body is BUILT for sex! Anything that a man can take delight in, on a woman's body, this girl possesses. Thus she is part of this new phenomenon of white girls possessing asses. Back in the day, white girls used to have bony butts, or the kinds that curve inwards, or the "stick figure" look or WORST, no butt at all. However, with the onset of rap or other black related topics , some of them started to evolve and black guys EVERYWHERE began to take notice. The rise in interracial relations in this country is directly proportionate to this fact because not too long ago, it was not "cool" for white girls to be curvy. Everyone wanted that "tall, leggy blond" look, so a mere 6 years ago, NO ONE, but the brothers, gave a fuck about Kim Kardashian. Remember, Paris Hilton was the it girl for the moment. So as I saw Serah's curvy behind awaiting me, the animal came out of me and took over. I entered her and furiously began to give her long, deep, hard strokes as I was urged on by her eager moans. I was standing and so I placed my right hand down on the desk that was directly beside her bed,  so in a moment, things began to fall off desk with every second. Stev can tell the story better as he told me the next morning that at one point, the house began to shake. Thus he said he was content simply listening until his girl got jealous asking, "Hey why are we not having sex?" So he obliged her request. Serah kept moaning "Harder!, Harder!!, Harder!!!," and so I kept going faster and faster until I finally climaxed. As I did, the nearly three months of no sex flashed before my eyes. I felt like I had been baptized in the waters of "Lake Serah" so I collapsed into her a new man. For a moment, we lay motionless in her bed, as we both had to catch our breaths. After rolling over she looked over at me, and obviously gassed, she managed to say, "I think you broke me!...But in a good way." I could only laugh and once again I was desperately thirsty and so I grabbed my cup to head to the kitchen, while Serah ventured into the bathroom. As I hit the hallway again, Stev was standing there half erect, with his condom still on. We could only manage a laugh, and a high five, as we walked by each other. I swear, I must have drank 7 full cups of water and I was still thirsty. Eventually, I managed to return to the room but the door was locked. I walked back to the living room and noted that Stev was not with his girl so he must have entered the room with Serah. Were we about to swap??? I grew excited. Stev, Wheeler, and I had once joked about swapping our girls once upon a time, but lately Stev and I have been very serious about accomplishing this. He was definitely in the room with Serah and so I walked to the futon where his girl was laying and began talking to her to gauge her interest. Mind you, Serah is the HOTTEST out of all of her friends, so her friend should wish that I would want to hook up with her. However, this was entirely by chance and Stev and I had laid no groundwork for a proper swap, so his girl was ENTIRELY lost as she rolled over and curled up on the futon. Being a gentleman, I couldn't just spoon with her entirely naked so she threw me a pillow as I sat on the edge of the other couch and watched the rain. Moments later, Stev emerged from the room giddy like a school girl as he said, "Thanks Mike." Apparently, she wasn't aware that it was him when she returned from the bathroom and so as she climbed into bed with him, he reached out and grabbed her ass when she said, "No! I need a few days." I laughed at this fact and told him at least he got that close. His girl was bullshitting, so we slapped fives and promised to tackle the swapping issue soon enough. I returned to the room and climbed back into bed with Serah, and before I passed out. I managed to say, "That's HOW you do a birthday!"

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Easter Weekend: The Last Hoorah: (Thursday): "She Did What?!?!?(part 2)"

          With pitcher in hand, Stev and I made our way towards State St and into Blue Front. It was around 6 or 7 in the evening so by 1502 standards, we were on par to the start of a pre-game. We picked up a 24 case of Bud Light and as we approached the counter to pay we noticed a brightly, colored starry sign that advertised a 5th of Three Olives vodka that was on sale for $13 dollars. Now Three Olives is a respectable brand of vodka that usually retails around the $20 dollar mark, so curiosity got the better of us. Plus when you are drunk, you tend to notice bright and shiny things. I looked at the collection of bottles on the counter, and after noting that there was only one flavor I had but one question. "What the fuck is passion fruit?" No one has ever walked up to me and handed me some "passion fruit." I wasn't aware that a fruit could invoke so much emotion that someone actually decided to name it "passion fruit." So I looked up at the attendant and queried him. "Wait a minute! What game are you guys playing here." I told him that I worked in retail thus when something is priced drastically lower than it should be, someone is CLEARLY trying to get rid of it. ESPECIALLY when, just above his shoulder were the rest of the Three Olives brand, lined up among the shelves. I looked at him and said, "Buddy is it that bad? For $13 dollars, I'm drunk and curious enough to still buy it but between me and you, is it that bad?" He started blushing sheepishly like a pre-pubescent girl who has just seen her first penis. He then tried to sell us with a thick, un-American accent and I could see right through this weak attempt. So I looked at him and said, "Cut the bullshit, I already said that I'm going to buy it. It's that bad isn't it?" I observed him try, and desperately fail, to hold back a giant smile as he looked away and started to shake his head. It was too funny so we just paid and grabbed our purchases on our way back to Hotel Arch. 

          As soon as we returned to the basement, we got the music going and decided to tackle the passion fruit first, as Stev placed the Bud Light in the fridge. We poured our mixed drinks and from the instant that the drink hit my palette, I SHUDDERED at the awfulness that was assaulting my taste buds. Stev and I looked at each saying, "That's WHY it's $13 dollars!" We were laughing but it was that bad. So Three Olives if you're reading this I'm VERY disappointed that you would put your brand to such a distasteful drink! You could have fooled me that I was drinking Burnett's, or Mohawk, or the rest of that swill (Don't get me started). Stev and I were in too good of a mood so we decided to press forward and un-passionately drink the rest of this so called passion fruit. On two separate occasions a funny moment arose as Joe and Jack both came downstairs and after peeking in the fridge said, "What the fuck is going on here! You guys have been down here raging for two and half hours and there's only 3 beers gone from the Bud pack?" At first, in my drunken stupor, I was with them like, "Yea! What the fuck!" Who dares question 1502's drinking merits? However, I thought about it and realized that Stev and I had been drinking for a while from Charley's to the bottle of passion fruit that was 3/4ths of the way consumed. After explaining this fact we all had a good laugh. Quick side note: I recently discovered that both Joe and Jack have "John" as their given names. Maybe the next time that I see them I will attempt to use "John,"  but it already seems weird enough by how I've come to imagine them. 




          Stev had  showered first so as he was donning his evening wear I followed suit into the shower. After getting dressed I was returning to the couch to continue our drinking when Stev and I struck  up a conversation that I had no business hearing first from him. I do not recall exactly, but he must have asked me about my first live show, a week earlier on Wednesday. Thus during that conversation I said to him, "Oh yea! Amanda called me right before the show to wish me luck." He replied with, "Oh that's cool. She was actually just in Baltimore and invited me to come out to a wedding reception." (To understand how FURIOUS I'm about to be, you must read the previous posts). I was slightly ahead of him as we were walking towards the front of the basement to continue our drinking, thus when what he said sunk in, I immediately turned around and demanded, "SHE DID WHAT?!?!" Stev continued with, "Yea about 2 weeks ago, she hit me up and said that she was in Baltimore for her friends wedding and that I should come and hangout with her. And actually, like I told her, the only reason that I didn't go was because I was in Atlantic City with Stann for a bachelor party. Noting my displeasure he continued with, "Yea, now I think about it, it was weird how she ended the text with, "Oh yea, me and Mike don't talk anymore." "How did she even have your number," I asked? But I answered my own question as I thought about it. When we had a mini reunion in late January in AA, Amanda had come on that trip with me. At the time I didn't have a phone so I had to text my sister and Stev through her phone. That Friday, Stev was being an ass and not responding to my text messages so her I went out together. It was the next night that all of us hung out and so she only met Stev for 5 hours tops, where she was with me the whole time. Yet this was somehow enough time to save his number? After that trip I remember that Stev told me that he had accidentally contacted that number thinking that it was me, and she told me the same thing so it wasn't an issue. Sadly, it was shortly after that January trip that her and I stopped talking in any form. Stev didn't know because I was suffering in silence and so the only person that knew was Ray when he called me once and asked me how I was doing. Imagine these dates. I'm discovering all of this on April 21st, so save for her calling me a week prior before my first show, I had no contact with this girl since February 15th; and that was over text message. I had not spoken or seen her since the end of January. As our conversation continued, I learned from Stev that after his accidental messages to her, she would randomly text him out of the blue asking him what he was up to and starting random conversations. So when she said that her I "don't talk anymore" that can be interpreted as "talking" in the dating sense. What in fact was happening was that her and I were not even on speaking terms in any fashion, on the phone, text message, Facebook, Skype, instant messenger, nothing! Thus I'm learning that ALL WHILE I'm at home missing this girl something awful, for over two and a half months, she been making attempts to carouse with one of my best friends. IS SHE FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?! Here's what made it worse. A week prior, when she had called me to wish me luck on the show, she told me fact after fact from her recent traveling spree, to her buying a new car, to what was going on with him, AND that she had just returned from a wedding in Baltimore. Guess what she CONVENIENTLY chose to leave out? Thus whether she was purposely trying to hurt me or not, one word about trying to hang out with Stev and this would have been a none issue. All I would have sarcastically said is, "That's not cool. Trying to hangout with my boy and we're not speaking," but then it would have been over. 

          I must say though. If your girl and your friends can't get along, then you either need new friends or a new girl, thus I would hope that her and Stev could hangout and have fun together. In fact with my knowledge, her Stev could have passionate sex and it would not bother me one bit. If anything I would be there holding a camera, offering tips, getting them drinks, etc. Stev and I have long been intending to swap partners so sooner or later it's going to happen or at least the Devil's Threesome. This is how highly I regard Stev, he's my "brother from another," it's all love. Notice however, that all of this would be with my knowledge. What kept bothering me was why did she feel the need to conceal this from me? During that phone conversation, she told me everything imaginable except this fact and so it means she PURPOSELY chose to leave it out? So I'm left to ponder why do people tell lies of omission? If I didn't care about Amanda then this would have been a none issue but I was steps from falling in love with girl. This was the first girl that I've even KIND OF opened up to, so it felt like utter betrayal and here was the kicker. She had a friend Jessica that I had actually made out with once upon a time at a summer party, but it meant nothing and all of this was before I met Amanda. Thus I would always tease her saying, "Why don't we call Jessica over and make this a threesome." She would always snap back, "No! That's my friend, it would never be her." Thus the week before my show, Facebook indicated that it was Jessica's birthday. I actually debated wishing her a happy birthday but then I ultimately decided against it because out of respect for Amanda, I didn't want to make it seem like I was carrying on with her friend, when her and I were not even on speaking terms. I respected her feelings on Facebook, online with 1's and 0's, how much more real fucking life? She shouldn't even have had his number so I don't care if she needed Stev to go save some hungry orphans. Those little motherfuckers better learn to hunt, if that was the last resort! I'm being funny but I'm SOO SERIOUS. I don't care if she was in a fatal car accident, and somehow Wheeler was across the street playing WOW, Cassie was foraging for nuts and berries, Stev was eating a watermelon; slowly, and Chin was solving an algorithm or something, with her dying breath she better call Jesus, before she thought to call one of my friends, when "her and Mike don't talk anymore." IS SHE FUCKING KIDDING ME? Notice how there were no mutual friends in that list as these are all people that she would ONLY meet through me; if you call 5 hours "meeting someone." So someone PLEASE tell me if I am wrong? I want to be a bigger man and I'll quickly apologize if I am? Her trying to get at Stev is like me trying to hookup with untouchables like Nicknames, Laura, Camarillo, or Kiph (This one is really shocking as it's a guy so CLEARLY it's for Cassie's amusement :). I was LIVID but I calmly managed to ask Stev, "If anything had happened, would you have told me?" He admitted that he would have and his friend I have to hold him to his word. That's what real friends do. They tell you things even if it will upset you and especially when they are involved. Thus you as their friend can now respect that they came to you, so you may be initially mad but you guys can eventually work it out. This is how it should be. A lot of people like to believe the lie, NOT ME. I don't care what it is. You hurt me now, and let me deal with the consequences or PRAY to God I don't find out through some back channels because that's when I can't help but to get FURIOUS. Making a mistake is one thing, we're human, shit happens, but then to try to conceal said mistake is like adding insult to injury. It's like stabbing me in the back was NOT enough, you had to use the rusted, serrated dagger, in hopes that I catch an infection as well (lol. If it wasn't me, I would be laughing my ass off). I digress. 

          So from my tone, it's safe assume that my night was ruined. As much as I tried to not let it bother me, this was an impossibility in my inebriated state. At Rick's, I was a shade of my former self but there was not an overabundance of girls. I did see one girl on stage that was facing me and so as I went to grab her hand Stev, swooped in, with hawk like precision and grabbed her from behind. CLEARLY he hadn't been out of the game for as long as I, so his reflexes were a bit quicker. It was no biggie as she turned out to be Asian, his first one, so congrats on that (Long Story, but I'm turned off from Asians for a while, I'll explain in a future post). Thus Stev went home with the Asian and I returned to Hotel Arch. I called Ray after 2 am and he didn't pick up, so before falling asleep I brought myself to text her. When I'm trying to get over someone, I delete their number but as she had contacted me last week to wish me luck on my show, I found her number in my log and sent this message. "Ayo y would u hit up my dude in bmore tryna hang out with him??? Talking bout some 'me and mike don't talk no more' if you don't talk2 me u don't talk2 my boys." Before I fell asleep a tightness developed in my chest, that admittedly has been there since I found out, and so it was this somber thought that carried me off to sleep. 

Easter Weekend: The Last Hoorah: (Thursday): "She Did What?!?!?(part 1)"

          I awoke on Thursday and immediately had work to do. My visit to AA that weekend was mostly pleasure but I had to get the business out of the way. I had scheduled a 1:00 pm meeting with my academic adviser at Angell Hall and being that it was about 3 hours before then, I decided to venture around campus. I brushed my teeth and went upstairs. Everyone had a final at some point in the day, so the house was quiet save for ESPN coming from Joe's TV. Before heading outside, I borrowed some flip flops from Sweeny's room and donned my blue Chicago Cub's hat that Chin had gifted me during our secret Santa. For whatever reason he thought that I didn't like it and this was not the case. I seldom wore it because I wanted to get "1502" inscribed on the side, but that would mean heading to my "guy" in the hood who does that work. I hadn't been to his store in about a year and a half but I loved the hat. Thus I made it a point to pack the hat on this trip to AA. By the way AA is "Ann Arbor" it just gets tedious writing out the actual letters when "AA" suffices. I headed out of Hotel Arch and unlike when I had arrived the night before, the sun was shining and people were walking about. This was the AA that I remembered. I threw my headphones into my ear and thumbed through my Crackberry for Big Sean's "My Last." It seemed like the perfect soundtrack for this Easter rendezvous in AA. As recent graduates, you tend to know the people ahead of you, and few classes below you, thus we realized that any future visits to AA would be different because we were now "Alumni." Gone would be the days of simply crashing on someone's couch, so we had to get it in this weekend. I turned left from Hotel Arch and made my way towards Angell Hall. I observed the various students walking back and forth from studying or taking their finals and I couldn't help but wonder if they appreciated their unique position as Wolverines. Personally, as soon as I came to appreciate my time in AA it was over. Thus my walk that morning was filled with nostalgia at all the different locations I had once been. I made my way to Angell Hall and continued browsing around as I had some time to kill. Graduation was around the corner so an enormous white banner was hung in the hall with the title being, "Before I Die I Want To..." With markers the students were supposed to write out their aspirations so I was naturally drawn to read some of the notations as people interest me. I was a sociology major after all. 

          As I began to read some of the posts, I realized that A LOT of people do not know how to dream. I once had this conversation with Amanda that a dream should be something that's out of the ordinary. Maybe it's just me being an immigrant and having this concept of the "American Dream" but a dream should be as extravagant as possible, and a lot of what I was reading was stupid. "I want to cross the street." Really? That's what you're going with? You can do anything in this world before you die and "You want to cross the street"??? Obviously I'm exaggerating with that one but most of them were matter of fact statements that didn't seem to fit like the "I want to go to Subway" post. I was left asking, How is this noteworthy? Is going to Subway that arduous? Shit if you don't like meat, they have the veggie sub, right? The only movie that I ever walked out of and wanted to turn around and  immediately walk back into was "Inception." My takeaway from the film was that "the most contagious thing in this world is an idea," because as humans we have this unique ability to drastically change the world around us and on the same token destroy it. No other creature on earth can claim this hence why we are higher beings than animals (I'm about to go on a tangent but I have to say this). 

          At Angell Hall, we once had this debate in philosophy about animals. If we as humans didn't have the acumen to have technology, and we were out there foraging with the animals, do you think that wolves, and bears, and lions and tigers, and alligators, etc would have fireside chats to determine if they wanted to eat us? "I'm not going to hunt Michael today, it might hurt his feelings." No! This is why PETA and some of these vegetarians slay me. This is America and you have a right not to eat meat, but shut the fuck up with that "holier than thou attitude." So if I recall correctly, the philosophical argument was that "all animals are the same and we should regard all of them equally and avoid behavior that purposely harms them." Do you realize how many insects get "murdered" on your windshield by simply driving your car? Following that logic, we shouldn't drive, fly planes, or have any kind of transportation. Thus if you are not nimble enough to tip-toe everywhere, you should probably lay in bed all day because you don't want to hurt the animals. Insects are animals too. So I would ask, what separates an insect from a chinchilla from a dog? Oh I get it! It's only animals that you like, you know the "totally cute/cuddly ones!" You see the hypocrisy. I love animals and would never want them to be purposely hunted towards extinction, but if you farm alligators/chinchillas for example, with the sole purpose of making hats, and coats and shoes, there is nothing wrong with that! Michael Vick went to jail for two years for dog fighting! He was wrong as you shouldn't be cruel to animals so you fine him, or suspend him or whatever, but two years in jail was excessive. OJ KILLED a motherfucker, and got less time; allegedly. In 1977, Roman Polanski DRUGGED and RAPED a 13 year old girl, and to this day is hiding out from the US in Europe, while making Oscar award winning films that you go and see, and got less time; allegedly. Shit in the same NFL, people have been busted for slanging cocaine, shooting people, beating their wives, and killing people in DUI accidents and they all received less time than Mike Vick. Are you kidding me? Admittedly, Vick was an asshole so they wanted to make an example out of the rich, cocky, black athlete. However, two years in a jail system, that we all admit is overcrowded, was excessive. This is why they laugh at us in other countries because we have become so PC in America. So in ending my mini rant, do you know what they call dogs in other countries? DINNER! Think about it.


          So in returning to my point about dreams, they should be as un-ordinary as possible. When you think about it, some of the greatest inventions in this world, the inventors didn't set out to be "great." They were simply curious. Once upon a time cavemen were walking around with square wheels. All it took was some drunk asshole from "Cave Ricks" to be like, "What if those wheels were round?" At first someone would have said, "Shut up Bob!" Until someone would actually think about it and say, "No! what if they were round?" The rest is history. Or when one guy is driving down the street and another guy is driving towards him in the opposite direction. BOOM! They suddenly crash and are hurled towards each other. "Hey, you got peanut butter in my chocolate," would come one guy. "You got chocolate in my peanut butter," would return the other, and before they died, the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup was invented. Bill Gates didn't invent the computer, his only desire was to make it simpler to use. Now he is the second richest man on earth. This would not have been possible without the thought of "what if" or "why not?" Thus when Sweeny says that he wants to one day be President, I'm pretty certain that it did not occur like this. One day he was masturbating  in his window at Hotel Arch and as he was nearing climax he shouted out through the window, "I WANT TO BE PRESIDENT OF THE WORLD!!!" Rather, it was an idea that took root into his head somewhere as a boy. Thus when he eventually made it to Michigan he majored in pre-law. Then he got accepted into law school and more than likely, he will try to work in a public office to set himself up to one day run for the Presidency. Thus if he ever achieves this dream, you will be able to back track and look at all the decisions that helped him reach that position. However none of it would have been possible without a dream that began as a tiny thought. I continued to read the banner and I did laugh at the "I want to have sex in the stacks" post. Who would do that? Admittedly I am very proud that I am the only member of 1502 to achieve this. Wheeler led the way, but the study carrels are NOT the same thing as the actual stacks. I eventually met with my adviser and we talked about life, my student loans, and grad school. I learned about "InCircle," which is social networking that is exclusive to Michigan alumni. People post job offers, and roommate searches, etc, and it is all free. I had wrongly assumed that all of those alumni services required money. I left his office feeling inspired as this was the type of guidance that I was missing at home. I hung out with my sister for a few hours and as I returned to Hotel Arch, E was dropping Stev off.
          
          As the house was still empty we decided to head straight to Charley's to begin our epic weekend. To be honest, the most fun that I have ever had at Charley's has been in the daytime. I remember after my last final as an undergrad, Stev met me at Charley's and we spent two hours getting shit faced but it was FUN! We arrived at Charley's and took our seat. The place was busy but we managed to find an empty table to the right of the entrance. We talked about everything that we were up to since we had last seen each other in January and our graduate school plans. Remember, I don't go out drinking at home so with the sun shining outside, it was good simply laughing and being around girls. We ordered our pitchers of beer and I felt so good that I decided to drink straight out of the pitcher. It was that kind of day, where no glasses were needed. Everyone around us commended me on the decision. The only buzz kill were this shift of servers. This was the most unattractive collection of women that I had ever seen wearing those red and black Charley's shirts. I'll use this analogy. Everyone knows that there's a difference between JV and varsity athletes...These were REPLACEMENT players! I half wanted to say, "Don't worry about it sweetheart. I'll go get my next drink, so that I can tip myself!" Stev and I drank and laughed for about two hours before we decided that it was time to officially start our pregame. When we decided to leave, I still had some beer in my second pitcher and so I decided to stand up and simply walk out with pitcher in hand, and a bottle of "Clancey's Gourmet Hot Sauce." Side note on Clancey's, I do not know what they put into those tiny bottles of hot sauce but it MUST be crack because I am hooked! Before returning to Hotel Arch, we decided to pick up some liquor/beer at Blue Front before Stev told me something that "grinds my gears" every time that I think about it...

Go Cubs? Or 1502...
That Crack!

Monday, May 16, 2011

Easter Weekend: The Last Hoorah: (Wednesday)

          A week rolled around and it was the Wednesday before Easter. I had already  taken the rest of the week off from work, so there was no reason for me to sit around the house. I packed my things into my backpack and in a flash I was on my bike and on the highway. The forecast had called for rain so I prayed that I wouldn't get rained on and arrive in Ann Arbor soaked. I sent Sweeny a text message and rode onto the highway. Side note: Our first winter in the States, I was moderately frost bitten during recess as I was playing in the snow. Anytime that you have been frost bitten, that part of your body is more susceptible to cold, thus my hands get cold very easily. This made those last four weeks of football in high school unbearable. Thus before I stored my bike in the winter, I knew that I would need heated grips because from our November trip to Hotel Arch, I got off my bike and my hands were frozen in a claw motion. "The Claw!" (Shoutouts to you if you know where that quote is from). So before bringing my baby out of storage for the spring, I made sure to install heated grips and they certainly paid off. After about 35 minutes of fast and furious riding (pun intended), I arrived at Hotel Arch and parked my bike. The sky was gray and hazy, as rain was in the forecast, thus campus looked dreary. It had snowed in Michigan that Monday, and I remember how this had pissed me off at home because it was technically spring. Maybe AA was echoing my sentiments that day. I walked into the house expecting the inhabitants to be raging. Fail! The house was strangely quiet and I could not figure it out. I walked through the kitchen and noted the mess that greeted me. Either Sweeney had died or was being held captive like Piggy in Lord Of The Flies, or he had just given up any hope of getting the guys to clean up after themselves. I ventured downstairs to set my bag down and from what assaulted my eyes, I should have turned around, went back outside, re-boarded my bike and rode back home. 

          We were in town that weekend to RAGE, and from the looks of things, they had been raging since 1976. There were food cartons and containers everywhere. Naturally there was uneaten food in each and every container. There was pizza, something that looked like soup, something that looked like Chinese, scrapes of BTB, etc. Beer cans and bottles were literally everywhere as if Hitler himself had blitz bombed the basement with cheap beer. The trash can looked like someone had played a game of Jenga with it, as the trash had now toppled over and was surrounding the floor. I wish I was exaggerating but "mess" is not a strong enough of a word. I couldn't even find a place to sit without feeling uneasy. Thus I immediately set myself to cleaning the basement. I had stayed there for almost a month after we left 1502, so to show appreciation I would always try to keep it neat and tidy, so cleaning up was not a big deal. Besides, I cannot bring myself to relax in a mess that I did not help to create. I grabbed a trash bag and began discarding all of the pieces of trash that were around. I changed the trashcan and inserted a new bag into it. I picked up all of the old beer bottles and cans and took them to the backyard. I grabbed a Lysol wet wipe and wiped down every table surface. I gathered all of the blankets, Febreezed all of them before neatly folding them and stacking them neatly. I dusted every couch and proceeded to spray Febreeze on all of them as well. I tidied up the TV stand by rolling up stray video game controllers, and what not. 

          I wiped down Stev and Laura's "True Love" photo and laughed while I was doing this. It was on a whim that the pictures were up there in the first place. He had left a book bag to be thrown out, when he and Chin had left Ann Arbor in the fall. I forgot who I was with but we opened the book bag to discover a bunch of goodies. There was a toy gun, an unopened DVD collection of Lost Season 3, and two pictures with Stev and Laura (I assume she's "Number 1"). Thus as a joke we said that we should display the picture as an example of true love. This had occurred back in the fall, so to have made it all the way towards the end of the school year was what "tickled my fancy."(I do not talk like this. It's just from time to time I have to try out new phrases to see if I can sneak them in) I continued with the cleaning up and I eventually was able to vacuum. After one last round of Febreeze in the air, I sat down on the couch confident that I would not contract something. One by one, the boys eventually made their way home and in talking with St. first, I realized that campus was quite because they were in the middle of finals week. This stunned me because it seemed earlier than it should have. This meant that in a week, St. and Sweeny would be graduating and I would be back in AA because my sister would be graduating as well. Everyone went off to study for their individual finals and I returned to the basement to do some work of my own. There was a City Year program that I was applying to, so I decided to compose the essays that night. The rest of the night was filled with me finishing those essays, ordering some Chinese right before they closed (I HOPE they didn't spit in my food), and watching the Detroit Red Wings win their playoff game and Chris Paul beat up on the Lakers in game 1 of that series.


          In closing, I just realized that I have ZERO pictures of my baby. Anyone that knows me, is well aware that I have a thing for older women, well my baby is about 7 years older than I. So the two pictures that follow are first of the knob to activate the heated grips and then a full profile of my baby the 1981 Yamaha 550 Maxim. Ladies if you see a handsome, black guy on this bike, feel free to ask for a ride, but try to be discreet about it as my baby tends to get jealous. Cheerio.


"Post-Graduation: Home And Heartbreak (Part 8): Apart From Amanda"

          We returned from our trip to Ann Arbor and that is when I noticed that things began to change. If I did not call or text her first, I would not hear from her. I assumed that she was busy and thought nothing of it. We saw each other once more in late January after our trip to Ann Arbor and she apologized for being "difficult." Side note: Jen was the first girl that I LOVED going down on. I took pleasure in driving her wild with my tongue, to the point where she would have to fight me to stop, as she could not stand it any longer. Amanda was the second girl that I loved doing this to. So that night, I indicated that I wanted to see her as I had not seen her since our trip to Ann Arbor. It was late and she responded with "Are you trying to use me for sex?" I laughed at this but honestly responded with a "No." My thinking was, Valentine's Day was that upcoming Monday and I wanted to surprise her. As many a guy will tell you, NO THANKS TO HALLMARK, many girl's now expect things on February 14th. So my thought process was I would get her something before Valentines Day. Thus if we didn't do something extravagant, she would know that I cared for her and was thinking about her. I bought her a long stem chocolate rose and yes I wanted to see her, but my true motive was to sneak the rose into her room. How I envisioned it was that she would find it when I wasn't there and be perplexed as to how it ended up in her room (I can cake with with the best of em). So she showered and drove over at around 2 am to pick me up. The rose was too tall for my pockets so I had to stick it in my sock but it still hung out, so I had to resort to a sidewinder walk. We made it over to her place and her father was out of town and her mother worked nights, so only her sister was there. So back to how I began this side note, I ended up going down on her in the family room with the TV on. Can you blame me? I have a sexual nature (points for honesty you hypocrites). I really have this belief that as a male, one of your duties is to make certain that your woman is sexually satisfied. I think that as guys, we get caught up in being a "provider" that some males take their women for granted. So I really believe that if more males regarded their partners sexual needs as highly as they regard paying the mortgage, or car note, or utilities, then ALOT more relationships would last longer. So I said we weren't going to have sex but I never said she wouldn't get hers. She was half naked on the couch to my left and my legs were sticking out to the right. Thus my head is in between her legs, doing what I do. However, nearing the moment of climax, I felt a tugging on my right leg. What??? I raised my head to observe her fat ass cat tugging at my right leg. It had sensed the chocolate rose in my sock and was now pawing at it. 

          So if you can imagine, I was trying to finish Amanda off to the left while kicking the cat away on my right, all without Amanda realizing what was occurring. It's quite funny if you think about it, but about 5 minutes later I had achieved success on both fronts. Admittedly I felt proud, but I still had to get the rose to her room. So we begin talking and she explained that lately she had a lot going on and that's where her attention had been. I told her I understood and all I was after was to hear from her once in awhile to make certain that she was good. We eventually made our way to her room and I immediately crashed on her bed. Quick side note, my mattress is a piece of shit! The springs are all irregular and provide the opposite of a comfortable sleeping surface. So I would like to take this opportunity to formally apologize to any girl that has ever slept on my bed. "Yeezy taught me better than that!" Now I am laying in her bed and have to get her out of the room. Think Michael! "Could I have some water," I asked as slyly as I could without trying to draw attention to myself. She obliged and I rushed to the desk stand that was in front of her bed and placed it in a cup that housed real flowers. I fidgeted with it until it looked unassuming to my eyes.  I was able to leap back into bed a second before she opened the door and returned to the room. The next morning we awoke and began talking. I hadn't seen her since our trip to Ann Arbor and so it felt good simply "shooting the breeze" with her, however I should have asked her to take me home immediately. Somewhere along the conversation, she looked up and noticed my chocolate rose. "How did that get there," she asked? "How did what get where," I returned. "That rose," she exclaimed! "What are you talking about, I assume someone bought it and gave it to you," I replied. (wink wink) "Wait! Did you do that?" she continued with her eyes lighting up. Fuck! I had to act fast. So as calmly as I could, I looked at her and said, "You must have me confused with one of your other lovers. I don't even know where you live (which is true), how would I magically get you a rose?" She considered my logic and calmed down for a second to think. My head was saying, "I think she's buying it!!!" So I watched as she responded with, "Yea your right, how would you even get it in to my house without me knowing? We were together the whole time..." I watched in slight disappointment as she connected the dots and lit up once more, "It was when you asked me to get you water! I know exactly what it is. I bet it has chocolate in it" She had me but I couldn't admit it. The way that she was finding out was "Not how I drew it up in practice." Thus I brushed what she said aside saying, "Shoot, you'd wish I would get you a rose. You better ask one of your other lovers, I DON'T like you like that!" We laid around in bed for a bit longer before she took me home, thus after that day I thought she would stop being distant.

          However, when I went three and a half weeks without hearing from her I knew something was wrong. It was unsettling that we could go that long and not have a conversation. When I met her, she told me that she was applying to an Au pair program in Italy that would last for 6 months to a year and I was excited for her. This is the time of our lives where we should be pursuing all of our heart's desires so that when we finally settle down, we can say that we did not miss anything. So if I could not manage seeing her for 3 and half weeks, how could I manage 6 months to a year? My desire to see her was more emotional than physical. If you care about someone but you do not hear from them in 3 and a half weeks, you're going to be naturally concerned. I knew then that whatever was consuming her had to do with her husband so my last desire was to add to her unrest so I let her be. Two weeks later I got a job offer from Rite Aid and was excited as this was one of the positions that I had applied for with her aid. I now had a phone and a job so things were looking up. She had said that when I began work that we would go out to celebrate. As it was, my first full day was the Monday of Valentines Day so I planned a dinner for us after work where I would pay with the last $30 that I had. I was excited about not only getting a job but now being able to pick up the check because it felt weird when she would pay for things, especially now that I considered her as my girl. That first day was a tough one but it was Valentines Day and I was expecting to see her afterward so I did not mind. Early in the day, I sent her a text message during one free moment but received no response. After work, I sent her another message and two hours later, I still received no response so I was really concerned. 


          If you have read my previous posts then you know that this was not how she responded to me on the phone. Secondly, I finally just got a job and it was Valentine's Day! The one day of the year where couples are encouraged to cake, that's slang for being cute. Thus to not even be receiving a response from my texts begged the question, "What is going on with her?" If she was with another guy that was fine, but all she had to do was express that she had plans. That way I would not be expecting to hangout with her. So I waited about two hours after work before sending her a text message that began with, "Are you okay? If I don't hear from you in nearly four weeks, I'm naturally concerned?" She finally responded with some message that ended in "let's keep it simple." I'm thinking good for you, but that was affirmation and not an answer to my inquiry so I asked once more, "What's good? We used to talk about anything and lately you're very distant. Again she replies with a message that ended in "let's keep it simple." I'm now getting irritated. Recall I'm fresh from my days in Ann Arbor where keeping it simple is what I did senior year. Due to class and tests, and internships and differing schedules, you could go weeks and sometimes months without seeing an old flame. However, once you saw each other you hooked up and they went on their way. Simple and I'm world class at it. However, when I met Amanda, she was the one who wanted to open up and meet families and etc. I was PERFECTLY fine with a physical relationship where I would put it down and send her limping home. So it was her that opened the door for us to have an emotional connection. This "keeping it simple" bit of hers was almost comical because I was wondering "Is she serious?" I expressed this fact to her and once again, she replied with "let's keep things simple." Now I'm annoyed! This girl was just not hearing me. Her birthday was a week from that Monday, and she would be out of town in Florida. Thus I had written a song for her called "Happy Birthday Marie," which I might throw into my novel, "Galfing: A Young Man's Guide" and so I planned to email the song to her. However, the guy that was mastering my songs for my mixtape, "The Graduate," was giving me trouble. Mastering is when you take a song and bring it to radio quality, thus I had just paid this guy full price for the 22 songs on The Graduate and now he was trying to charge me again for this one song. He could just as easily add the birthday song to the collection of 22 songs so that I would not have to pay. Thus in frustration I let the "cat out of the bag" and expressed this to Amanda saying I wouldn't be going through all of this trouble with someone I was just "keeping it simple" with. I continued by telling her that I didn't want to be an asshole but why should I be caring for someone if obviously there was no reason to. I expressed that if I should pull back and not care for her that she should let me know immediately instead of leaving me feeling bewildered. Again she responded with some cryptic answer and I was thoroughly confused. I did not understand the game that she was playing but in giving her the benefit of the doubt, I asked to see her the next morning to clear the air before she went on her trip to Florida. At least in person, I could better gauge her reactions than the night before. We had been arguing over text message, and you should never do that. She gave me some excuse for not wanting to see me and so two days later she was gone. 


          Here was my logic. Something was obviously awry in her world and I assumed that it was related to that guy that started with an "h" and rhymed with chubby. Thus I couldn't press her on the matter as she would have to tell me but at the same time I couldn't let her take advantage of me so I "put my foot down." I said that I would not contact her again until she contacted me. I just earnestly expressed that I didn't like her distant act, and so if she cared for my opinion she would contact me. Every other time that she went out of town she always managed to contact me. When I didn't have a phone or hers had died once, it was through Facebook or instant messenger. Thus I reasoned that if she called or sent a text message then I would go ahead and still send her the song despite already revealing the secret. The challenge was set and I was SURE she would contact me at least once. She left on a Thursday, nothing. Friday, nothing. Saturday, nothing. Sunday, nothing. Monday, her birthday, nothing. Now my phone is a "Crackberry" so when anything occurs that relates to you in the world, a Blackberry will flash to alert you. This is what they are designed for, to always keep you connected to the world. Thus every time that my phone would flash, I would pick it up with anticipation as I was sure it was her. WRONG! Those five days, I was let down more often than Chin would have been in a room filled with other Asians. So on her birthday, after work, I had a decision to make as the clock ticked towards midnight. Do I break my word or stick to my guns? I stuck to my guns as it was the principle of the matter. So three weeks go by and I've heard nothing from her and those weeks were TERRIBLE. I felt like I had lost something and I just couldn't find it. Remember it was in the middle of winter so we were getting blitzed with snow seemingly everyday. Thus my days were in a cycle of perpetual grayness. I would wake up, and trudge to work in INCHES of snow as it had not yet been plowed. The work itself was very mundane but the music at Rite Aid was the WORST. 

          The songs that they played were on a loop and I swear 95% of them dealt with break up in some form or fashion. Yet these songs were not the kinds of songs that anyone would want to listen to EVER, much less when they are in that state of mind. If you're going to make me sad, at least make me want to hear the song again. Most of these songs were the opposite and made me want to rip out my ear drums. I am certain that in one dark chamber of hell, these songs are on repeat simply to torment those who appreciate good music. Not a day transpired that I didn't stop and ask, "What on earth are we listening to?!?! Shoot me and just get it over with, PLEASE!!!" Most of these songs were from the 1960's and for whatever reason a bunch of them had a quartet singing the whiniest, sappiest songs about breaking up, like a reject version of The Beach Boys. I knew people would think that I was exaggerating so I actually wrote down some of the lyrics that were bombarded, DAILY, in my head. No bullshit...1.) "They say that breaking up is hard to do..." 2.) "If there's a new love in your heart, hurt me now, get it over..." 3.) "It's raining it's pouring, my love life is boring...(after this one, I actually stopped and asked one of the customers "This is a joke right? I'm being Punked right now? No! It's an actual song!)" 4.) "When can my heart beat again, when does the pain ever end..." Once in awhile a good song would actually play like John Legend's "Ordinary People" or Angie Aparo's "Cry" and you would find me in the isles singing my heart out, like it was Sunday night karaoke at The Brown Jug. I can hold a tune now and so the customers loved it. 

"Cry" by Angie Aparo
Chorus:
Could you cry a little? Lie just a little?
Pretend that you're feeling a little more pain.
I gave, now I'm wanting something in return.
So cry just a little for me

    
           I felt like Bill Murray in a bad version of "Groundhog's Day" so I knew that I was going to go crazy if I didn't channel myself purposefully. Thus one day as I sat in front on my laptop, I was clicking through some old files when I found "Galfing.doc." It was the beginning to the guide that I had started after the fall semester of our senior year. It was about 20 thousand words at the time and so I opened it up and I LOVED what I had written. Thus I set out to complete it and this is when I realized that I couldn't just write a guide to Galfing. For people to understand, I had to write a novel. I had to tell the story of 1502 and myself. To do the story justice, I would have to backtrack and tell it from the beginning. This is where I decided to employ the "story within a story" aspect that drives the novel. On the surface level, the main character "Lucien" sets out to write the official guide to Galfing. However, underneath, you receive Lucien's tale about how he came to write those official rules. So ultimately, the story is one of personal growth. I set myself to a schedule of about 2000 words a day. At first it was difficult but the more I wrote, the more the words flowed out of me. The plan was to be finished by the time of our Easter reunion trip to Ann Arbor. I had envisioned that the novel would end at about 80 thousand words but as I kept writing, I realized that I would have to move that budget up to around 135-140k words. I poured myself into my writing as I was spurred on by the angst of missing her. As I figured it, she would go on to Italy for a year and so the next time that I would see her would be possibly years later. By then I wanted to be really successful so that I could throw it in her face. You have to understand this is how I think. Save for a physical fight, when people have hurt me over the years, my response is usually tempered. I've never had the need to cuss out your mother, or any of that other foolishness as I am sure that your mother is a nice woman. I look at it like, if I can achieve in spite of you, that speaks volumes. At that point, I never need to say another word to you. All I need to do is show up and let my confident silence do the talking. So I really believed that our next interaction would be 3 years down the line or something, so I was coming to terms with this. 

          April rolled around and before I knew it, it was a week before our Easter trip. That Wednesday, I had my first show down at the Bullfrog bar and grille and the promoter had wanted me to get the word out about the show. Thus throughout that day I was on Twitter, tweeting away. As my tweets are linked to my Facebook profile, she must have seen one of my tweets on Facebook and so she called me. I picked up the phone expecting that it was the promoter because the number was not saved in my phone. Side note, I do this thing where I delete numbers from my phone. It makes trying to forget someone a whole lot easier, especially when their name starts with an "A." Anytime I went into my phone, she was at the top of my contact list and this was not helping, so I deleted her number. So I am literally in my boxers as I was about to hop into the shower to prep for my show, when I picked up the phone. It was a girl on the other line and it took me about ten seconds to realize that it was her. It was April 15th, and I had not seen her since the end of January. I had not heard from her in any fashion since February 15th, and not a day went by between that period that I had not thought of her. I was at a loss for words as I really did not know what to say to her. I think I may have began the conversation with, "I don't know any Amanda's." She thought I was joking so she laughed as she continued. It had been more than 2 months since I've heard ANYTHING from her so what immediately struck me as strange was that her tone was like nothing had happened, as if she had just seen me mere hours ago. I had been SUFFERING trying to get over this girl, but I didn't query her on it.  I explained why I had not wished her a happy birthday and I asked her why she couldn't simply talk to me. She explained to me that she felt that she couldn't talk to me about him. Hmm. Now I have a Michigan degree, and can "read good" from time to time, so this sounded like BULLSHIT. If our relationship began because we could talk about anything including him, what changed in February where we couldn't talk about him? However, it was her story so I didn't press it any further. We continued our conversation and before wishing me luck on my show, she told me she had bought a new car, and had been traveling all over. In fact, she had just returned from a friend's wedding in Maryland and so her exact words were, "Baltimore is fun! You should get down there sometime!" Hmm. Boys and girls, whom from 1502, that we know WELL, is from Baltimore???

"Cry" Angie Aparo